Attachment Healing Institute| Treatment for Neglected Children and Their Caregivers

Therapists who offer treatment for neglected children and their caregivers often tell me of their frustration in getting these children to engage in therapy. Children who have suffered severe trauma that has impacted their ability to attach to their caregivers tend not to trust adults of any type. Being able to actively engage in therapeutic treatment requires that the child at least be willing to therapeutically trust the therapist. When a child cannot, they are often labeled by the therapist as “resistant”. Such a perspective makes it difficult for the caregiver to feel that anyone will be able to help them bring about a change in the child’s behavior.

At the Attachment Healing Institute, we train therapists in a neuroscience approach to working with children and their families who have been identified as having attachment issues. Attachment is a relationship based disorder and responds best to treatment when a caregiver is a part of the treatment process. Our model depends on the caregiver being willing to do their own attachment work and being willing to become more authentic in their communication with their child. Often times, this requires the caregiver to be willing to explore what it means to engage in right brain communication.

Through our tone of voice, facial expression, closeness and intent we communicate more about what is going on inside, and our willingness to be emotionally present for another, than we communicate through the actual choice of words. Creating emotional safety is the absolute number one step in helping a child and their caregiver create an environment in which the child can begin to heal in relation to another.

The human brain does not change in isolation. The human brain changes in relation to another. Whether this other is the birth parent, foster parent, extended family or family friend, it is important that this person be willing to do their own healing. The mature calm adult brain must lead the way for the child’s immature distressed brain to follow.